The ego conundrum

So there I was, in the midst of what I expected to be a casual chat with a girlfriend. It started off innocently enough, with a question that seemed straightforward: “If you could change one thing about the world and actually succeed, what would it be?”

You'd think this would be a breeze to answer, right? Wrong. We found ourselves stumped, wading through a sea of thoughts, and, truth be told, we probably didn't come up with a concrete answer by the end of it. This wasn't just about picking a problem out of a hat; it was a deep dive into some pretty hefty stuff: What's the ultimate issue plaguing the world? Can we truly make it better? Is there an 'ideal' state for the world, even though it's never been in one? If so, how can we envision this 'ideal' state without ever having seen it? And the biggie - what's stopping us from getting there?

What I thought would be a three-minute rapid-fire Q&A morphed into an epic, no-holds-barred philosophical exploration. The only clear thing was that a problem exists; otherwise, why would we even be asking the question?

Here's the kicker: solutions are everywhere. You see them in the media, protests, debates (even the presidential ones), Instagram posts, you name it. They're the go-to weapons in the ever-popular 'us versus them' political playbook. But try to pinpoint the actual problem, and you're in for a hundred layers of research. We market solutions like hotcakes, but identifying the real problem? That's way down on the to-do list, which is, frankly, absurd.

But wait, maybe that's the answer in itself. It seems we don't view ourselves as part of the problem. It's relatively easy to demand rights and freedom (important, yes), but way harder to look at our responsibilities and how we should react to our privileges. We're quick to call out others for shirking their societal roles, but how often do we check ourselves? We're all about change, as long as we don't have to change. To put it bluntly, if getting rid of all evil meant wiping out humanity... well, let's just say it'd be a pretty empty world.

I've been pondering the classic 'love thy neighbour', which seems to have been overshadowed by the more popular 'love yourself'. The idea of serving others is often relegated to those seen as 'marginalised' or in need of a superhero to take up their cause. As a woman, the notion sometimes makes me cringe, like it's a label slapped on me at birth. But what if I've got it all wrong? What if serving is just contributing? What if it doesn't mean you're any less competent or capable? What if it's a choice open to everyone, a sign of contentment, responsibility, independence, and an appreciation of rights, rather than a symbol of weakness?

Maybe the real issue is that we don't want to be responsible. Deep down, what we crave (consciously or not) is to be treated as special, responsibilities aside. But if everyone's special, then really, why should anyone be? Life's like a real-life 'Game of Thrones', where everyone's building their own little empires.

So here's what challenges me: stepping outside of myself, and looking at things impartially. It's easy to see all the good in ourselves and all the bad in others (especially those who disagree with us). If you ask me, the root problem of the world is self-centeredness. Just like old-time scientists thought the universe revolved around the Earth, we walk around thinking the world revolves around us.